A Healthy Dose of “No”

Let’s face it – we never want to say “no.” For many caregivers, it just might be the most difficult word in the English language. We always want to help, and we want to do our best to meet any request.
 
But as actress Claudia Black says, “Saying no can be the ultimate self-care.”
 
Saying no is all about creating and maintaining healthy boundaries (one of our favorite topics). We all need boundaries on our time, energy, and space. Failure to hold firm to these boundaries can leave us feeling overburdened and overcommitted. 
 
Our friends at PsychCentral.com explain it further: “Learning how to say No is incredibly important in our lives. Doing so helps us maintain healthy boundaries and relationships with others and ourselves and also allows us to be more thoughtful and committed to the things we say Yes to. In spite of understanding the benefits of being able to say No when needed, many people (myself included) continue to struggle with actually doing so.” To help, they offer these 14 ways to say no.
 
And here’s a great resource from our friends at Esperanza Magazine for Anxiety and Depression with some excellent tips on the art of saying no.
 
Why is it so difficult to say no? For many of us it could be fear of conflict, fear of losing love, or fear of disappointing others. These fears lead us to say yes when it’s really in our best interests to say no.
 
Having a strong sense of self-worth also helps us say no. When you can identify and defend your needs and value your independence and self-care, then you become more comfortable taking on only those tasks that fit with your goals and desires.
 
Learning that it’s OK to say no can be a big first step toward self-care. Have you taken that step?