Strength with a Purpose
“When you know your strengths, you know where you can be strong on purpose.” — Marcus Buckingham
Caregiving is hard, but none of us comes to this journey empty-handed. We bring skills, values, and inner resources that help us navigate our challenges and achieve our goals. Identifying those strengths is part of self-discovery. When we slow down enough to understand who we are beneath our responsibilities, we gain clarity about what sustains us and what drains us. This knowledge helps us shift from surviving each day to caring with intention.
Through my caregiving I have developed NEW strengths—or maybe I’m just using my strengths in new ways. I’ve always been a “mama bear” and fiercely advocated for my children when they were in school, but I also worked to empower them to learn how to advocate for themselves. Then, when my parents entered assisted living and nursing home facilities within months of each other, I was called to advocate in entirely new ways to protect their rights and assure their safety.
While I like to think of patience as one of my strengths, caregiving has stretched that strength in ways I never expected. Through caring for others, I’ve learned to practice even deeper patience and kindness—especially in moments that test me the most. I truly believe that each of us is doing the best we can with what we have, and when I focus on seeing the strengths in others, it helps me respond with greater patience, compassion, and grace.
Looking honestly, without judgment, at where we feel confident and where we struggle helps us respond early and prevent burnout. Here are some simple tools that can make this possible:
3 TOOLS FOR IDENTIFYING YOUR STRENGTHS:
Noticing Your Strengths: Pause and reflect on moments when caregiving feels even slightly easier or more aligned. Asking questions like “What helped me get through a hard moment today?” or “What do others often thank me for?” helps us name strengths such as persistence, advocacy, empathy, or creativity. Regular reflection builds awareness of what already sustains us, so we can use those strengths intentionally instead of relying on sheer endurance.
Values-to-Strengths Mapping: Start by identifying what matters most to you (e.g., family, fairness, stability, compassion, learning) and then connect those values to how they show up in your caregiving. For example, valuing fairness may reveal a strength in systems navigation or boundary-setting. This tool helps us see our strengths as purposeful and value-driven, which increases meaning and protects against emotional exhaustion.
Feedback From Trusted Others: Ask one or two safe people, another caregiver, a peer supporter, or a trusted friend, “What strengths do you see me using when things are hard?” Others often notice strengths we overlook, especially when we’re tired. Receiving strengths-based feedback reinforces self-trust, counters negative self-talk, and helps us lean into what works rather than focusing only on what feels heavy.
Identifying our strengths doesn’t erase the challenges of caregiving, but it can equip us to meet those challenges more sustainably. When we know where we’re strong, we can act on purpose, set healthier boundaries, and ask for support without guilt. Strengths awareness builds resilience, reinforces hope, and reminds us that caregiving doesn’t have to come at the cost of our well-being. By committing to self-discovery, we choose a path that honors both the care we give and the person we are becoming along the way.