JUNE 2023 Newsletter: EMPOWERMENT ... Grow Through What You Go Through 🌱

We LOVE talking about EMPOWERMENT! Empowerment is a "form of strength that stems from the self and community." It's also a process of BECOMING. Becoming stronger and more confident. As caregivers, empowerment is important for taking care of ourselves - self-empowerment - and providing care to others.

Empowerment might just be the BEST part of our "job." As we work to empower caregivers of ALL kinds - we're working to support them in becoming the best version of themselves! WHO do YOU want to BE or become?

Empowerment has kind of a RIPPLE EFFECT ... as caregivers become more empowered - they set an example for those in their care - they are role models for their loved ones to be more empowered, too!

As we work to prevent caregiver burnout - we love to empower caregivers to be their best selves.

5 TOOLS TO MANIFESTING EMPOWERMENT

MINDSET: What you THINK you BECOME! Notice - what is your current mindset? How do you feel about it? Do you want to make a change? You can SHIFT your mindset - make a list of your core values - how you want to BE and become - and set a goal (or two) towards pursuing those!
AFFIRMATIONS: Use affirmations to inspire you or reframe your thoughts. Affirmations are a great way to focus on positive self-talk and manifest the YOU that you want to BECOME.
JOURNAL: Journaling allows you to remember the good, bad and ugly from your day - a reminder of how you are BECOMING. It helps you to visualize where you've been and where you want to GO.
MEDITATION: “Meditation is an excellent way to start manifesting a better version of yourself. It’s about silencing and clearing the mind of all negative, unnecessary, and disturbing thoughts and ideas from the mind. With meditation, you can develop self-awareness, stress management skills and learn positive thinking techniques.” ~ Seriah Sargenton, Riyah Speaks
COMMUNITY: Find a community that cares - that lifts you up when you can't stand - that believes in you, and your potential, when you're feeling low. Surround yourself with like-minded, motivated people who empower you to be the best version of yourself.

Check out our entire June newsletter focused on Empowerment here.

Saying “No” Is a Healthy Practice

“The root of self-care is setting boundaries: it's saying no to something in order to say yes to your own emotional, physical, and mental well-being.”

~ Nedra Glover Tawwab, "Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself"

Some concepts are so essential to self-care that they keep coming up in our conversations, and this week’s topic is one of them. Ever since we started Courage to Caregivers, we’ve been talking about the importance of setting healthy boundaries. But let’s face it, we can all use a refresher now and then on how to both SET and MAINTAIN healthy boundaries.

EmpowermentKristi HornerJune 22, 2023Boundaries, Healthy Boundaries

Show Empathy and Compassion … For Yourself

Our topic this week puts an even newer spin on a relatively new concept – holding space. Caregivers are typically very good at holding space for others, which means being physically, mentally, and emotionally present for someone who needs us. What we want to talk about is holding space for yourself.

When we hold space for others, we allow them to feel their feelings. We commit ourselves to supporting them when they need our help. We give them our full attention, and we listen in a non-judgmental way.

EmpowermentKristi HornerJune 15, 2023Holding Space, Holding Space For Yourself

Creativity Lets You Be You

Creative expression is a great way to process emotions, vent energy, and have fun! It can increase your happiness, stimulate positive emotions, improve mental health, sharpen brain functions, reduce stress, and even make your immune system function better.

Recommit Don't Quit!

Back in January, we set an intention for our year. As we near the midpoint of 2023, we invite you to look back with reflection at that intention without judgment or shame. How’s it going? What have you learned? What’s working? What’s not working? Good news: You still have more than six months to work on that intention.

We are all about empowerment, which just happens to be our theme this month! Why? Because that is the key to making our solution to caregiver burden sustainable. It’s what makes preventing caregiver burden possible. It starts with an intention – your intention – that something needs to change. That the way you’ve been selflessly caring for someone else has taken a toll on your life and you want to make a change. We know we can’t change our loved ones living with mental, chronic, or serious illness, YET, we can find courage and compassion, and we CAN cope. You can find portable, sustainable tools for coping and managing stress that build and form lifelong habits. With practice, you can build a PRACTICE.

EmpowermentKristi HornerMay 31, 2023Recommit Don't Quit!

MAY 2023 Newsletter: GROWTH MINDSET ... You Have the Power to Grow 🌱

Carol Dweck, Ph.D, author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, coined the terms fixed and growth mindset to describe beliefs around learning and intelligence.

Having a growth mindset allows you to BELIEVE in yourself and see yourself as growing. A growth mindset is our belief that we have the power to develop our talents and build our abilities. We can improve ourselves, develop new skills, embrace challenges, overcome setbacks, and reach our potential. Nothing but opportunity and possibility!

"Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as being stuck somewhere you don't belong." ~ Unknown

As caregivers, we can be hard on ourselves. For just one moment today - pause and notice. Reflect on all that you do. Show yourself some gratitude for the resilience you've show in ...

... the grief you are working through
... the heartbreak you are journeying with
... the pain that has strengthened you

Look at how far you have come. Remember - you have overcome 100% of your hardest days so far. You are still growing! 🌱

Check out our entire May newsletter focused on Growth Mindset here.

The Opposite of Shame

This week, we’re talking about two feelings that can be hard to understand, recognize, and respond to, even though they are common to all of us. The words “guilt” and “shame” are often used interchangeably, but they are very different. The fact that it is so hard for many of us to distinguish between the two and focus on them openly led us to think about them in a different way, which is why we chose redefining guilt and shame as this week’s topic.

Growth MindsetKristi HornerMay 17, 2023Guilt, Shame, Redefining Guilt & Shame

Life Is Not a True/False Test

How often do you find yourself thinking in extremes? … I’m either a success or a failure … I’m either right or wrong … You’re either with me or against me.

When we find ourselves thinking in terms of true or false, good or bad, my way or the highway, we fail to recognize that the world is complex, diverse, and filled with shades of gray. Instead, we experience cognitive distortions that inhibit our growth mindset. We use words like “always,” “never,” “impossible,” or “perfect” when we evaluate ourselves and others. We become stuck in our own thinking and limited in our relationships. And we have little chance to learn from our mistakes.

Grow Through Healthy Curiosity

We have lots to talk about this month, as our theme will focus on having a growth mindset, and this week’s topic is staying curious. Growth occurs in many ways, and one of the most important sources of growth is curiosity. By asking the basic questions of who, what, where, when, why, and how, we learn new things about our world and ourselves.

Growth MindsetKristi HornerMay 4, 2023Curiosity, Staying Curious

April Newsletter: Self-Compassion + Connectedness + Common Humanity = HOPE

Life can be HARD - I likely don't need to remind you.

Life is filled with moments of joy AND ordinary AND pain. In my most tender moments supporting loved ones (or myself) through immense physical or emotional pain, I've shared my thoughts on how we might navigate our one and precious life. We were never promised a life of only the “good” emotions - like joy and happiness - life comes with the good AND bad - a full spectrum of experiences.

How often do you find yourself asking "why ME?" I've been known to say this and "enough is enough" - how much pain can one person endure?

Sometimes, life feels unfair.

But as you navigate your story - your journey of life - remember, you are NEVER alone. Never alone in your joy OR your pain.

When I founded Courage to Caregivers - it was a passion project. After losing our brother to suicide, my sisters and I knew NO ONE should take this journey - of providing care to someone they love living with mental illness - ALONE. We had felt so very alone all those years providing mental and emotional support for our brother.

Over the years, talking with people, hearing their stories, holding their hands on their journey of pain - whether it be grief, loss of any kind, chronic pain, physical pain, emotional pain, isolation, or loneliness - it can feel hard and overwhelming. One of the things I've learned is ... people want to know they aren't ALONE. We work to validate each caregivers' experience and affirm and normalize their feelings.

“The very definition of being “human” means that one is mortal, vulnerable and imperfect. Therefore, self-compassion involves recognizing that suffering and personal inadequacy is part of the shared human experience – something that we all go through rather than being something that happens to ‘me’ alone.” ~ Kristin Neff

Walking hand in hand with someone else is one of our greatest gifts to each other. Common humanity = you are NEVER alone.

Check out our entire April newsletter focused on Common Humanity here.

Feeling Lonely? There Is HOPE!

One of the most common feelings caregivers express to us is loneliness. As caregivers, we can feel isolated from the rest of the world because of our responsibilities, our loved one’s challenges, or the cultural stigma surrounding mental health. As humans, we are hard-wired for social connections, and loneliness can affect our health and well-being. And we don’t have to BE alone to feel lonely. For these reasons, breaking through loneliness is one of the most important topics we can cover.

Common HumanityKristi HornerApril 20, 2023Breaking Through Loneliness, Loneliness

The Right Way to Grieve Is YOUR Way

This week’s topic is a universal one. Everyone experiences grief and loss. The death of a loved one may be the first thing that comes to mind, but we can also feel grief over many other situations in life, such as the end of a relationship. Caregivers often experience complicated grief – long-term, unresolved, persistent grief, ambiguous grief, loss without closure or clear understanding, or the loss we feel when a loved one is still living but not fully present.

Common HumanityKristi HornerApril 13, 2023Grief, Loss

Bridges of Love and Empathy

“Love builds bridges where there are none.” – R.H. Delaney

There’s a reason we use the term “loved ones” in our mission statement: “To provide hope, support, and courage to caregivers and loved ones of those living with mental illness.” With all the complications and struggles involved in caregiving, we recognize that love is what drives all that we do.

Common HumanityKristi HornerApril 6, 2023Building Bridges, Bridging Differences

March Newsletter: Mindfulness - Presence is the best present 🎁

Mindfulness may feel "trendy" or just an "overused" term to you. Before we launched Courage to Caregivers in 2018 - it did to me, too! As I have come to understand, appreciate, and aspire to make mindfulness a practice in my daily life, mindfulness has become my #1 coping strategy for the stress of caregiving.

I face stress as a caregiver each and every day. I support a young adult with a traumatic brain injury and aging parents (one newly minted 90-year old) - both living in our home. Using mindfulness as a coping strategy for the stress of caregiving, I am able to better regulate my emotions, sleep better (and return to sleep more effectively), notice when I'm not focused on what's IN my control, and find myself simply more present. I also love that mindfulness is rooted in COMPASSION - and we're all born with the capacity to be mindful.

I now find myself focusing on my breath (it truly can be that simple - and our breathing meditation classes have shown me just that), using affirmations and intentions and focusing on the present.

Mindful Magazine (our go-to for all things MINDFUL) has an excellent definition of mindfulness: "Mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we’re doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around us. Mindfulness is a quality that every human being already possesses, it’s not something you have to conjure up, you just have to learn how to access it."

Check out our entire March newsletter focused on Mindfulness here.

I Will Survive … and Thrive

We hear a lot of survival stories from caregivers. And we get it. We all have times when we feel that we may be heading toward burnout or that things are spinning out of control. It takes all of our effort just to survive in such situations, and it’s hard.

MindfulnessKristi HornerMarch 23, 2023Survival, Thrival, Survival to Thrival

It All Starts with a Smile

In our support for caregivers, we focus a lot on ways to relieve stress and cope with difficult situations. One of the best stress relievers and coping mechanisms I know is humor. Though the situation may be serious, and no one is denying that it is, a good quip or a funny joke can be a stress reliever for everyone.

MindfulnessKristi HornerMarch 16, 2023Happiness, Laughter, Humor

Slow Down … Be Present

“When you are present, when your attention is fully in the Now, Presence will flow into and transform what you do. There will be a quality and power in it.” – Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now

No matter what we have going on in our lives, there are times when we need to slow down, be present, and be mindful. Mindfulness is the ability to focus on the present moment while calmly recognizing and accepting our thoughts, feelings, and body sensations. Being mindful frees us from being stuck in the past or trying to control the future. It allows us to be aware of where we are and what we’re doing while not being overly reactive or overwhelmed by what is happening around us.

For caregivers, mindfulness means learning to live in the moment, accepting the reality of our situation, and filtering out distractions.

MindfulnessKristi HornerMarch 9, 2023Mindfulness, Being Present, Living Mindfully

The Wave of Emotions

One of our favorite visualization techniques is to think of emotions like waves in the ocean. They’re always coming and going … they’re neither good nor bad … and they don’t last long. Some emotions may make us feel uncomfortable, but if we view them like waves, it can be easier to let go of them. Watch them go away like the waves going back out to sea.

Inhale … exhale … let go.

Now you have freed up space in your mind and heart that you can fill with positive and helpful feelings such as happiness, contentment, hope, and excitement.

That little exercise is one way of regulating emotions.

MindfulnessKristi HornerMarch 2, 2023Emotions, Emotional Self-Control, Regulating Emotions

February Newsletter: Finding Yourself Again ... The Journey of Self-Discovery

During my hardest caregiving days, I felt as if I had lost myself - who I was at my very core. I lost sight of myself. It's as if I hit "pause" on my play button - in order to care for others so they could move "forward". In the meantime, during that pause, I was lost.

It took me a LONG time to notice and ultimately figure out why I was struggling. I had to find peace with focusing on ME again. I had to remind myself that taking care of me, too, is NOT selfish. It allows me to reclaim WHO I am, WHAT I'm doing and WHY it matters.

Throughout February as we explored our theme of Self-Discovery we dug deep to find more joy, identified our strengths and opportunities for growth, and worked hard on our self-compassion.

Self-discovery is the journey of finding your true self. It is a fundamental component of your journey of personal growth. It leads to greater self-awareness and helps you understand and regulate your emotions.

Self-discovery is a journey. Think of yourself as a perpetual perfectly imperfect work in progress.

It's about exploring your passions, examining your life, and taking steps towards personal fulfillment.

Check out our entire February newsletter focused on Self-Discovery here.

Self-DiscoveryKristi HornerFebruary 23, 2023Self-Compassion, Finding Joy, joy, Micro-Joy, Identifying Your Strengths

Treat Yourself as You Would Treat a Loved One

Tuesday was Valentine’s Day, and did you ever think of giving yourself a Valentine’s gift? How about some self-compassion?

Self-compassion is a perfect gift to give yourself … any day of the year. It’s a component of self-love, where we recognize our own worth and extend kindness to ourselves just like we would for others.

Self-DiscoveryKristi HornerFebruary 16, 2023Self-Compassion, Self-Love